Yes, it's been a long time...because nothing has happened between the last post and now that's relevant to this awful decision I have to make: to have or not to have a mastectomy. Probably I've lost all readers and I'm writing this for myself, but here goes.
I went today to consult with the plastic surgeon who would do the reconstruction if I do have the mastectomy. It was disappointing in that the choices are a 6-10 hour, very invasive surgery (TRAM flap, which means taking muscle from the stomach) or an implant, which though less invasive, has a higher than usual chance of not working well or maybe at all, due to my breast having been radiated -- I think he said 50%, though he also said that's just a guess, as usual. Apparently radiated tissue can't be counted on to support the implant, so there could be complications that would require either re-operating or removing it altogether.
I'm not a fan of tons of anesthesia and pain, so a big No to the muscle flap surgery for sure -- but I was hoping for better news for the implant. Also, he said there's no way an implant will look even as good as what I have now, and it will probably match the other breast in size no better or possibly even less.
I don't know if this will affect my ultimate decision except it makes it even more difficult. Ugh.
The next step is an appointment on July 5th with my oncologist -- I want to ask her about the timing, since I'd prefer to do the surgery in January, if possible.
"It's just a boob," said my daughter, who wants me to have the mastectomy. I should repeat that like a mantra: just a boob, just a boob.
